COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

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747man
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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by 747man » April 1, 2020, 9:22 pm

At 7:45 am today I was at ASDA that opened at 8 for seniors only. A young man came from the car park and tried to cut in at the front of the line, but an old lady beat him back into the car park with her cane.
He returned and tried to cut in again but an old man punched him in the gut, then kicked him to the ground and rolled him away.
As he approached the line for the 3rd time he said, "If you don't let me unlock the door, you'll never get in there."😀😂



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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by Drunk Monkey » April 2, 2020, 8:10 am

Desperate times ... OMG .. hope it wasnt a used one !!!

Image

DM
Claret n Blue all way thru .. Up the Iron
L2 Season 19/20 Codheads 0 Scunny 1 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i2qrsItFUug
8 minutes is the point of lift off !!!!!!!

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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by vincemunday » April 2, 2020, 4:05 pm

Steptoe
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The forest was shrinking daily but the trees kept voting for the axe as its handle was made of wood and they thought it was one of them.


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noosard
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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by noosard » April 2, 2020, 4:12 pm

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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by noosard » April 2, 2020, 4:56 pm

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Latest trend in quarantine stress baking? Toilet paper cake

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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by vincemunday » April 2, 2020, 5:40 pm

Another
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The forest was shrinking daily but the trees kept voting for the axe as its handle was made of wood and they thought it was one of them.

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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by Whistler » April 2, 2020, 5:52 pm

I had a bumper sticker in Texas that read 'Beam me up Scotty'. I often wish I could find one in Udon Thani

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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by tinpeeba » April 2, 2020, 7:51 pm

New UK Lottery Prizes
6 numbers = One ventilator
5 plus bonus ball = Hospital bed (ward)
5 numbers = Hospital bed (corridor)
4 numbers = Bottle of Calpol
3 numbers = Signed photo of Boris Johnson

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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by vincemunday » April 3, 2020, 6:34 am

Good morning Udon, it's the weekend!
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The forest was shrinking daily but the trees kept voting for the axe as its handle was made of wood and they thought it was one of them.

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Drunk Monkey
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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by Drunk Monkey » April 3, 2020, 6:47 am

Couple of belters there Vince .. BTW its FRIDAY TODAY :lol: :lol:
Claret n Blue all way thru .. Up the Iron
L2 Season 19/20 Codheads 0 Scunny 1 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i2qrsItFUug
8 minutes is the point of lift off !!!!!!!

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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by noosard » April 3, 2020, 9:18 am

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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by vincemunday » April 3, 2020, 9:24 am

Drunk Monkey wrote:
April 3, 2020, 6:47 am
Couple of belters there Vince .. BTW its FRIDAY TODAY :lol: :lol:
We ain't skint darn sarf Jon so we can afford to go out Friday as well. Friday is when our weekend begins.
The forest was shrinking daily but the trees kept voting for the axe as its handle was made of wood and they thought it was one of them.

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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by Drunk Monkey » April 3, 2020, 9:57 am

vincemunday wrote:
April 3, 2020, 9:24 am
Drunk Monkey wrote:
April 3, 2020, 6:47 am
Couple of belters there Vince .. BTW its FRIDAY TODAY :lol: :lol:
We ain't skint darn sarf Jon so we can afford to go out Friday as well. Friday is when our weekend begins.
at 6;34 am on a FRIDAY .. btw ..just dug out my vacuum cleaner... hands free today :lol:
Claret n Blue all way thru .. Up the Iron
L2 Season 19/20 Codheads 0 Scunny 1 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i2qrsItFUug
8 minutes is the point of lift off !!!!!!!

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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by vincemunday » April 3, 2020, 10:02 am

I hope it's not one of those new Shark ones Jon or we might be looking at microsurgery to sew it back on.
The forest was shrinking daily but the trees kept voting for the axe as its handle was made of wood and they thought it was one of them.

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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by Drunk Monkey » April 3, 2020, 10:09 am

vincemunday wrote:
April 3, 2020, 10:02 am
I hope it's not one of those new Shark ones Jon or we might be looking at microsurgery to sew it back on.
I always longed about having surgery on my man hood .. but alas it remains a distant dream ... the costs for the scaffolding alone besides the reduction surgery rendered it beyond the scope of this poor Northern peasant.

DM
Claret n Blue all way thru .. Up the Iron
L2 Season 19/20 Codheads 0 Scunny 1 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i2qrsItFUug
8 minutes is the point of lift off !!!!!!!

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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by noosard » April 3, 2020, 2:38 pm

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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by noosard » April 3, 2020, 2:42 pm

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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by vincemunday » April 3, 2020, 2:46 pm

English humour
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The forest was shrinking daily but the trees kept voting for the axe as its handle was made of wood and they thought it was one of them.

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Re: COVID-19/Corona Virus HUMOR??

Post by vincemunday » April 3, 2020, 3:12 pm

Chinese cricket team?
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The forest was shrinking daily but the trees kept voting for the axe as its handle was made of wood and they thought it was one of them.

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