Merit?

[newtovillagelife]

I guess this question is for those
of you with Thai partners. How often does your wife ( in my case) give to the monks? We live on a tight budget and it sometimes bothers me that she will get up early 2-3 times a week and do the merit thing. It's almost always food she prepares or buys. I never ask how much she spends, just grumble under my breath. Any thoughts?? Am I being oversensitive?

[tamada]

There's no standard rule for making merit. Mrs tam only does it on the more notable Buddhist days or on her significant dates whereas Yai quietly does it more frequently.

You're being insensitive and ignoring why she does it. For example, maybe she's thankful that you are together again.

[Whistler]

Duh. We live in Thailand, not a non secular country. Not even worth discussion.

My ex made merit every day, she wanted to be full of merit so she would be rewarded with a lottery win.

[Drunk Monkey]

I guess this question is for those
of you with Thai partners. How often does your wife ( in my case) give to the monks? We live on a tight budget and it sometimes bothers me that she will get up early 2-3 times a week and do the merit thing. It's almost always food she prepares or buys. I never ask how much she spends, just grumble under my breath. Any thoughts?? Am I being oversensitive?

My missus seems to.go through different phases of giving merit .. more so sone times of the year than others as in now ..she is up 5am to catch the monks as they pass yet im gessing that will stop after the new year ..she does also go to.the temple on a weelly basis ...im.cool.with it , up.to she i dont get involved as i am.a person without religion (can i say that)

All tbis said last week we did have a monk come to bless our new house ..good luck ceromony which took.about 2 hours and approx 15-20 family n close friends of my missus came.. all pretty painless i just turned up smiled again not really involved as she sorted everything out n paid whatever needed paying

Worth adding ..it is mai ly the older generation that make merit ..it seems that young Thais are leaning more n more away from.rieligion as a whole .....even with pressure from.parents to do "Buddha stuff".. the kids are revolting leaving just the diehard old grannies to carry on... correct right ..you do see many older men making merit ????

IMO ... we do reside here as guests so should not preach with regard to.this subject amongst others . best just go with the flow n not rock this particular boat ..keeps her in doors happy and no eareche when on the very rare occasions i come home late n bladdered

DM

[tamada]

I guess this question is for those
of you with Thai partners. How often does your wife ( in my case) give to the monks? We live on a tight budget and it sometimes bothers me that she will get up early 2-3 times a week and do the merit thing. It's almost always food she prepares or buys. I never ask how much she spends, just grumble under my breath. Any thoughts?? Am I being oversensitive?

...

All tbis said last week we did have a monk come to bless our new house ..good luck ceromony which took.about 2 hours and approx 15-20 family n close friends of my missus came.. all pretty painless i just turned up smiled again not really involved as she sorted everything out n paid whatever needed paying
...

You had the monks in and never and never thought to invite your mates over to do the ritual pissing on the spirit pillar?

Hold on... oops, sorry. That's right. You've got no mates.

BTW, missed you at Chris's on Chrimble (said nobody).

[Drunk Monkey]

I guess this question is for those
of you with Thai partners. How often does your wife ( in my case) give to the monks? We live on a tight budget and it sometimes bothers me that she will get up early 2-3 times a week and do the merit thing. It's almost always food she prepares or buys. I never ask how much she spends, just grumble under my breath. Any thoughts?? Am I being oversensitive?

...

All tbis said last week we did have a monk come to bless our new house ..good luck ceromony which took.about 2 hours and approx 15-20 family n close friends of my missus came.. all pretty painless i just turned up smiled again not really involved as she sorted everything out n paid whatever needed paying
...

You had the monks in and never and never thought to invite your mates over to do the ritual pissing on the spirit pillar?

Hold on... oops, sorry. That's right. You've got no mates.

BTW, missed you at Chris's on Chrimble (said nobody).

In response ...

The house blessing good luck thing was for Daos Thai family in close friends (Thai Buddhist) as stated ... im planning a get together for a few guys (you know most ov them) after the New Year and/or when ive finished the garden and mi snooker table arrives , nowt special just a keg or 2 of a nice Belg beer n a bit of scran ..maybe a pig on a spit... just fellas no monks priests , rabbis AND split arses (can i say that) as not gonna mess about with Thai food and females going through my underwear and sex toy drawer.

Re Crimbo day .... I went out on Xmas eve daytime so gave Xmas day a miss .. i did receive a few messages requesting my presence but i just couldnt be arsed n had a steak pie mushy peas , an apple crumble and roast chicken for mi doggies.

Please inform me when you are leaving Thailand again for your submarine so i can arrange a suitable date for the porky piss up at the new abode .. shortly after youve left OBVIOUSLY.

DM

[timmy]

I guess this question is for those
of you with Thai partners. How often does your wife ( in my case) give to the monks? We live on a tight budget and it sometimes bothers me that she will get up early 2-3 times a week and do the merit thing. It's almost always food she prepares or buys. I never ask how much she spends, just grumble under my breath. Any thoughts?? Am I being oversensitive?

...

All tbis said last week we did have a monk come to bless our new house ..good luck ceromony which took.about 2 hours and approx 15-20 family n close friends of my missus came.. all pretty painless i just turned up smiled again not really involved as she sorted everything out n paid whatever needed paying
...

You had the monks in and never and never thought to invite your mates over to do the ritual pissing on the spirit pillar?

Hold on... oops, sorry. That's right. You've got no mates.

BTW, missed you at Chris's on Chrimble (said nobody).

In response ...

The house blessing good luck thing was for Daos Thai family in close friends (Thai Buddhist) as stated ... im planning a get together for a few guys (you know most ov them) after the New Year and/or when ive finished the garden and mi snooker table arrives , nowt special just a keg or 2 of a nice Belg beer n a bit of scran ..maybe a pig on a spit... just fellas no monks priests , rabbis AND split arses (can i say that) as not gonna mess about with Thai food and females going through my underwear and sex toy drawer.

Re Crimbo day .... I went out on Xmas eve daytime so gave Xmas day a miss .. i did receive a few messages requesting my presence but i just couldnt be arsed n had a steak pie mushy peas , an apple crumble and roast chicken for mi doggies.

Please inform me when you are leaving Thailand again for your submarine so i can arrange a suitable date for the porky piss up at the new abode .. shortly after youve left OBVIOUSLY.

DM

will this be an " open " invitation DM as i dont eat much nowadays and not had a Archa in 11 months and 1 day ....555

[Drunk Monkey]

YOU are most definately invited timmy .. especially if your still eating n dri individual like a budgie....gotta watch out for those Jock freeloaders who come wearing Columbo macks and armed with tupperware boxes.

Btw im.back.on my strict diet from Jan 2 ..

Dm

[Laan Yaa Mo]

Men are able to become monks, women cannot. This means everything in a Theravada Buddhist society. To make up for this inability to become a monk women make merit by giving food and other gifts to the monks as they pass by homes or at the Wat. Women do not expect monks to thank them for these donations. In fact, the donor thanks the monks for giving them the opportunity to make merit.

Some older men do visit the Wats to add to their merit stockpile, but any male will have enough merit stored up from their past days as a monk that they know they have a clear path to Nirvana. Women do not have this luxury.

When the British ruled Burma, they thought women were the equal of men because of the tough bargaining Burmese women they met in the market place. But, the British got it wrong. They did not understand Theravada Buddhism and the inferior position of women in Burmese society since they could not join the sangha.

Monks are a field of merit for the laity.

[Jello]

I guess this question is for those
of you with Thai partners. How often does your wife ( in my case) give to the monks? We live on a tight budget and it sometimes bothers me that she will get up early 2-3 times a week and do the merit thing. It's almost always food she prepares or buys. I never ask how much she spends, just grumble under my breath. Any thoughts?? Am I being oversensitive?

My wife does the same, i accept that its her religious practice and part of who she is.

A inexpensive meal for the monk’s isn’t going to break your budget. Don’t let it bother you, maybe even try going with her once. I’m sure it would make your wife happy.

[tamada]

YOU are most definately invited timmy .. especially if your still eating n dri individual like a budgie....gotta watch out for those Jock freeloaders who come wearing Columbo macks and armed with tupperware boxes.

Btw im.back.on my strict diet from Jan 2 ..

Dm

Until when?

[Drunk Monkey]

YOU are most definately invited timmy .. especially if your still eating n dri individual like a budgie....gotta watch out for those Jock freeloaders who come wearing Columbo macks and armed with tupperware boxes.

Btw im.back.on my strict diet from Jan 2 ..

Dm

Until when?

Jan 3rd ... ..onnee kiding Jammy .

2 Jan to my first target that being minus 20kgs or 16 April .. which ever comes first,... if it takes longer so be it as my final target weight is 90 kgs

Hope that helps

Dm

[parrot]

I'm not a fan of the big, popular temples that need pickup trucks to follow the monks so their bowls can be emptied as they march along. I'm more a fan of small temples like Pig Head Temple (the actual name) where there's no visible hokey pokey being practiced on temple grounds, donated food is passed along on roller trays, then placed out on table for anyone to partake. A good many of those who do eat/take food home are visibly poor villagers. So, preparing something for the morning meal might be seen as a 'get out of jail' card for one's ancestors or for one's self when the day comes. Plus it feeds the monks and may serve a social function within the community. When we visit PHT, I always feel good about going........can't say I ever felt good about eating fish on Fridays when I was growing up.

[pipoz4444]

I have no issue with the Merit thing by Thai's and actually think it shows a degree of respect, something lost in many other parts of the world these days. To me it appears to be something that even today's younger Thai generation (particularly those up country) still seem to hold onto.

Still, I am not sure whether they are doing the Merit for themselves/their future or whether they are doing it more as respect for others, but I suspect it is often for the later. Someone may know

The family gets the Monks (usually about 5 of them) over to the house, 2 to 3 times a year, to do the house and garden blessing thing and presumably get rid it of the ghosts, I guess. It must work because the garden grows?

Some neighbors gather around and then afterwards they all drink piss and sporadically eat until midnight.

The local Kids roar in and out on their motorbikes, going up and back to the local shop, buying BBQ Chicken and or Pork skewers. A bit like a regular Saturday night in outer Udon

pipoz4444

[rick]

Yai is out there every morning at 5 a.m. to await the monks. Must have enough merit for Nirvana now! Her children (including my wife) do not, maybe go temple a couple of times a year or house blessing after a life event. Sometimes on the school run if monks are running late, we see women waiting outside there homes - practically never men. And very few young women. None of the close family have done the 2 week monk thing, at least in the last 12 years.

Not an issue for me, at this low level, and rarely asked to participate. Just need to keep the ATM working....

[Laan Yaa Mo]

I'm not a fan of the big, popular temples that need pickup trucks to follow the monks so their bowls can be emptied as they march along. I'm more a fan of small temples like Pig Head Temple (the actual name) where there's no visible hokey pokey being practiced on temple grounds, donated food is passed along on roller trays, then placed out on table for anyone to partake. A good many of those who do eat/take food home are visibly poor villagers. So, preparing something for the morning meal might be seen as a 'get out of jail' card for one's ancestors or for one's self when the day comes. Plus it feeds the monks and may serve a social function within the community. When we visit PHT, I always feel good about going........can't say I ever felt good about eating fish on Fridays when I was growing up.

It was special eating halibut and chips wrapped in newspaper on Friday evenings. This is not because my father was religious (we were Anglican in name only), it was just something we did, and it tasted great.

[Old Grumpy]

Men are able to become monks, women cannot. This means everything in a Theravada Buddhist society. To make up for this inability to become a monk women make merit by giving food and other gifts to the monks as they pass by homes or at the Wat. Women do not expect monks to thank them for these donations. In fact, the donor thanks the monks for giving them the opportunity to make merit.

Some older men do visit the Wats to add to their merit stockpile, but any male will have enough merit stored up from their past days as a monk that they know they have a clear path to Nirvana. Women do not have this luxury.

When the British ruled Burma, they thought women were the equal of men because of the tough bargaining Burmese women they met in the market place. But, the British got it wrong. They did not understand Theravada Buddhism and the inferior position of women in Burmese society since they could not join the sangha.

Monks are a field of merit for the laity.

Anyone interested in learning a little more about the "merits" of Buddhism may be interested to read the attached https://www.abc.net.au/religion/buddhis ... s/10518728
As regards the fish eating on Fridays I can remember this as a cause of religion not a dictate.The habit started over a ruling by the Catholic church not to eat any meat on Fridays so everyone turned to fish thus it became an established habit, which incidentally I still maintain to this day.This can be compared to the Buddhist principle of not killing animals on the Buddhist day every couple of weeks, whilst as you will see in my att note it is a more modern interpretation of his total "Do not kill: dictate, and of course in this modern age of freezers is divorced from "not eating meat" by all but the most fervent followers.

[Laan Yaa Mo]

Yai is out there every morning at 5 a.m. to await the monks. Must have enough merit for Nirvana now! Her children (including my wife) do not, maybe go temple a couple of times a year or house blessing after a life event. Sometimes on the school run if monks are running late, we see women waiting outside there homes - practically never men. And very few young women. None of the close family have done the 2 week monk thing, at least in the last 12 years.

Women will never have enough merit to achieve Nirvana. They have to be reborn as a male and join the sangha to be able to do that.

[Drunk Monkey]

Yai is out there every morning at 5 a.m. to await the monks. Must have enough merit for Nirvana now! Her children (including my wife) do not, maybe go temple a couple of times a year or house blessing after a life event. Sometimes on the school run if monks are running late, we see women waiting outside there homes - practically never men. And very few young women. None of the close family have done the 2 week monk thing, at least in the last 12 years.

An accurate accessment rick ..

Women will never have enough merit to achieve Nirvana. They have to be reborn as a male and join the sangha to be able to do that.

OR marry n rich aging falang

[Laan Yaa Mo]

Yai is out there every morning at 5 a.m. to await the monks. Must have enough merit for Nirvana now! Her children (including my wife) do not, maybe go temple a couple of times a year or house blessing after a life event. Sometimes on the school run if monks are running late, we see women waiting outside there homes - practically never men. And very few young women. None of the close family have done the 2 week monk thing, at least in the last 12 years.

An accurate accessment rick ..

Women will never have enough merit to achieve Nirvana. They have to be reborn as a male and join the sangha to be able to do that.

OR marry n rich aging falang

That will only get them a rebirth as a flea on a dog's behind.